Our Collective Voice: “My mum will openly tell people that, if there had been an option for help, she would have taken it”

My mum started going through early menopause at 40, when I was 21. I had just moved back from university and I was in charge of cleaning and starting dinner. Over time, my mum became more and more critical of anything we did in the house. “You haven’t made the bed evenly on both sides”. “You’ve chopped too many onions”. “You haven’t chopped enough onions”.

The shouting became so bad that it caused me anxiety which has continued to this day. My mum will now openly tell people that, if there had been an option for help, she would have taken it because she knows how much misery she caused. I think deep down, it is one of her biggest regrets that she never got help.

Reflection

•It is common to associate changes in hormones causing mood swings when we think about menstrual cycles, but did you know it could have such an impact during the menopause?

•When you think about symptoms of the menopause, do you ever consider the impact on loved ones and family members?

We have obtained permission from the author to publish their story as part of the Our Collective Voice campaign.